Many people have come to believe that money equates to evil, but the real cause of money affecting relationships has more to do with how the partners perceive its use. In many cases, one person will earn more through their career than the other, and they are usually considered the breadwinner. This is the person who feels they have a larger role in how the money is used within the relationship. It might seem that this is fair, but it has no place as a concept in a truly balanced relationship.
Equality for Both
When two people form a permanent relationship, each of them should have a vote in how their life will progress. They might disagree on the details, but both of them should be happy with their overall plan. Compromise might be called for in some cases, and each person needs to be aware that they are as responsible as their partner is for helping smooth the relationship through this type of gifting. Money here is not a poisoned plant for ruling the relationship, but it is a bone of contention between the two at times. Each partner should have an equal say in how money is spent and saved if the relationship is to continue.
The Balance of Power
Over the centuries, many personal relationships have been more about power than anything else. Men were mainly the ones who had all the power, and women were expected to obey every order their husband gave. Times have changed, and modern women are less willing to settle for their partner having all the power. They have their own money to spend, demand a say in how it is used, and they are ready to leave the relationship rather than becoming subservient to their partner. The balance of power must now be equal in relationships, and this is regardless of how much money or goods each person brings into the relationship.
Avoiding the Pitfalls
There are many couples who struggle with the pitfalls associated with income and spending, and few of them are truly prepared to deal with all the issues of money in a relationship. A good place to start is before any legal commitments have been made, and couples should draft a rough plan of how they will build their life together. This need not be a binding agreement such as a pre-nuptial, but it is a way for both partners to understand exactly what they are getting into before they take the plunge. They will be able to see what they need to change before it becomes an issue between them, and they can help each other make rational decisions that will stand against the test of time.
Money and relationships have often been at odds, but modern lifestyles have given both partners a chance to change that factor. Each of them can now have their own goals and dreams without hindering their future together. They will need to look at what they want, how they will share the burden, and careful planning can get them where they want to be without the frustration and tension caused by the subject of money.